Friday, July 31, 2009

fabyoolus friday

u may or mayen't know dat fer sum time i hav been ashamed uv da grout on mi kitchen floor. i look at pikshurz uv daisy an alwayz ask her how she getz her grout so cleen an fresh.
well brudderz an sistahz ... a very nice person named kevin came to mi howse da udder day an took care uv da growt sichyooayshun ... an da followin izza pikshur taken by mi mom'z noo fone (not da flip fone dat she lost an den found ... da noo one dat duzzen't take grate pikshurz ... but dat'zza nudder story)
lookit dis floor!
kevin even put a blu X on da floor becuz i told him i like to tell jokez on tuesday an he sed i shood havva X like da late johnny carson, or jay leno, or conan o'brien, or david letterman, hizself.
so i am proud uv mi noo-old floor.
wuddya think?

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

jus lettin u know on thursday (or late wednesday nite ... wutever comez first.)

lissin brudderz an sistahz ...
don't get eksited an jump up an down an laff an laff an roll on da floor an say ... "dis iz da beginnin uv werld peace an life iz grate."
don't do dat becuz u beleev dat kitten joba an i ar bes frendz an share owr food an groom eech udder an sleep nex to eech udder.
thingz aren't kwite like dat.
he still smellz.
he'z annoyin.
i don't like him 100%.
i wuz hungry.
dat'z all.
da end.

wut da? wednesday


Monday, July 27, 2009

tuesday

a d-o-g wen into a telegram offiss, took owt a blank form an rote:
"woof. woof. woof. woof. woof. woof. woof. woof. woof."
da clerk ekzamined da paper an politely told da d-o-g:
"dere ar only nine werdz heer. u cood send anudder "woof" fer da same price."
da d-o-g reeplide: "but dat wood make no sense at all."

harharhar!
i alwayz enjoy a good d-o-g joke!

riter'z block

dat'z rite brudderz an sistahz ... i hav had riter'z block ... an furdermore, mi stoopid compyooter won't uplode any uv mi hansum pikshurz so mi mom had to show me how to finaygul dat stoopid pikshur uv me lickin mi paw frum her fone! duhr.
but i will fill u in on sum nooz ...
now i'm not sayin dat i like dat kitten joba ... but i don't hate him az much az i yoozed to.
i think i hav ganed 1000 powndz in da las fyoo munthz. (jus sayin') i try to eet evreecat'z food deez dayz.
today i watched dat introoder cat eet owtside ... an sum time ago ... i ate nex to him. go figyer.
mi brudder whitey ford an i hav heeted discushinz many morninz. dey go sumthin like dis: "u moov whitey ... no u jh ..."
so dat'z it.
i hav not been onna walkabowt ... however mi mom haz been walkin an walkin. dis weekend alone she walked 23 anna half milez.
an dat'z da trooth.

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

tuesday

wut do elefantz do fer laffz?

dey tell peepul jokez!!!!

harharhar! i am rollin on da floor laffin an laffin!

Monday, July 20, 2009

ikaika turnz 5!

i wuz so buzy eetin wid dat smelly introoder yesturday ... i fergot it wuz mi grate frend 'kaika'z 5th birfday.

heer izza hansum pikshur uv mi furst frend on da catster when we hadda sleepover. can u see why i think 'kaika iz so verree hansum?

'kaika izza yankee fan.

heer he iz sportin hiz yankee cap dat i sent him sum time ago.

so ... in honor uv mi frend 'kaika'z fifth birfday ... i took owt mi speshul birfday hat dat skeezy sent me ... an i am celebratin (jus a day late) mi wunnerful frend'z birfday.


happee birfday ikaika!
(u can wish 'kaika a happee birfday heer: clik me! )

Sunday, July 19, 2009

da current advenchurz uv mi squillion, laffin an laffin ... anna surprize shot fer u.

sum time ago i shared a pikshur uv mi squillion, laffin an laffin, watchin a plant cuttin take root.
dis iz wut mi squillion iz up to today.
he took da cuttinz an planted dem.
good job laffin an laffin.

an now fer a surprize shot fer u.
dis mornin dat smelly introoder asked me if i wood like to join him fer brekfast. beleev it or not ... i sed "ok."
heer iz da surprize shot:

sum uv u mite be askin "wut da?" i dunno ... i wuz hungry.

da end.

Saturday, July 18, 2009

mom'z saturday stroll

mi mom went onna walkabowt dis mornin.
wanna know how many milez she walked?

i wooda walked wid ... but i diden't wanna slow her down.


Friday, July 17, 2009

fun friday

altho it iz not az hot az it wuz in da funshine state fer mi mom ... it'z sumwut hot heer on da island.
so i decided to stay inside today.

an heer i am chillaxin on da cowch in da basement.
life iz grate (an cool)

Thursday, July 16, 2009

da introoder

i gess dere wuz sum confyooshun az to hoo dat black an whitey wuz on mi blog yesturday.
i will tell u hoo he/she iz.

sum time ago i menchuned dat dere wuzza introoder in mi backyard. it wuz da black an whitey dat wuz on mi blog yesturday. he/she duzzen't havva name (an mi mom sed "n-o" to fill hyooz skeez.) dat introoder smellz an we jus sorta put up wid him/her (i'm thinkin dat it'z probublee a him becuz it smellz an girlz smell good ... rite daisy?) mi mom or dad feedz dat introoder everee day ... but he/she izzen't invited in da howse ... an dey never tride to catch him/her.
evree day mi dad callz mi mom an sez da followin:
"Berta ... did you feed Blacky?"
an mi mom alwayz sez da followin:
"Yes Ronnie ... I fed Blacky."
so dat'z da end uv dis story.
i hope u enjoyed it.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

da tuesday "jus sayin"

how long a minit iz dependz on wut side uv da litter box yer on.

in udder nooz ...

thank u fer yer thotz regardin mi recint wate gain. i gess dere iz jus more uv me to luv ... i hope, however, dat mi mom duz not put me onna diet.

(i feel pretty confident dat she won't ... mi brudder mickey wayz 300 powndz an she hazen't put him on a diet yet! harharhar!)

Monday, July 13, 2009

monday thotz

i wuz lookin in da mirror an thinkin dat i hav put on sum powndije.

i'm so embarrist.

Sunday, July 12, 2009

Friday, July 10, 2009

one uv da many thingz i did today

can u see dat i wuz loungin on da stepz goin down into da basement?
intrestin?
in dis pikshur heer i wuz hidin frum mi mom.
intrestin?

an in dis las shot i'm holdin on fer deer life so i don't roll down all da stepz.
intrestin?

maybe not so intrestin after all ... but mi mom thot so.
go figyer.



Thursday, July 09, 2009

a hole lotta thursday surprizez!

dis mornin ... rite away ... i wuz watin fer mi mom to open da door an feed me mi brekfast da proper way ..
not only did she mash mi food properlee ...
but ...

she served it inna dish fit fer da king uv catz!

i gess dat'z wut mi frend jj thinkz i am ...
da king uv catz! har!
...
after a grate brekfast (mashed purfectlee) ... mi mom an i opened sum giftz.
lookit dis!
it'zza madcap mowse!
(wut'z madcap?)
it'zza grate gift frum mi fabyoolus frendz auntie bee an sarge charlie

i luved it! "madcap" must be sumthin reelee grate!
an wile i wuz enjoyin dat madcap mowse ... mi mom sed
"Look at this, Jeter, puppy. Auntie Bee and Sarge Charlie sent you delicious Temptations as well! (lookit mi tongue in da pikshur ... i think dat sez it all!)


finallee ... wen i thot it cooden't get any grater ... mi mom popped open a gift frum da byootiful daisy da curly cat!
wut da?
lemme look into dis ...

i luv deez noo cyoobz!
(but more dan playin in dem i luved watchin mi mom tryin to put dem back in da bag! i wuz laffin an laffin!
deez ar grate an fabyoolus giftz an i luv dem all ...
but, brudderz an sistahz ...
da gratest gift uv all wuz havin mi mom back wid me ware she belongz!
an dat'z da trooth!

Wednesday, July 08, 2009

woo hoo wednesday

why am i smilin ... u mite be askin.
well brudderz an sistahz ...
after brekfast at da grate john g'z wid auntie bee an sarge charlie, hizself, mi mom iz ...
.
comin home ware she belongz!!!
hurry home mom! i need mi food mashed an served properly.

Tuesday, July 07, 2009

Tuesday

a wite-taled deer, an oringe cat, anna mowse walk into a bar ...
forchinitly, dey only ended up widda small bump on da head.


harharhar!

(i got da beginnin uv dat joke frum skeez!)

Monday, July 06, 2009

wut da? monday

now u may on mayen't know dat mi mom iz in da funshine state,
an u may or mayen't know dat she met sum verree importunt peepul frum da blogosphere.
but i diden't know dat i wuz gointa be dere, too.
but wuz i or wuzzen't i dere?
i don't know ... an i can't remember.

i look so small an two dimenshunal*.
i'm confyoozed.
*flat

Sunday, July 05, 2009

happy birfday to mi gram ...

u mite or miten't know dis lady.
it'z mi gram.
today iz her birfday.


happee 85th birfday to mi gram!
i luv her a lot!
(pleez send mi mom home soon! thank u.)

Saturday, July 04, 2009

4th uv july

lookit dis patriotic pikshur* uv mi brudder mickey an me ...
RED ... mi brudder'z eyez!
WHITE ... hiz byootiful white fur ...
an ...
BLUE ...da feelin we both hav becuz we're missin mi mom!
...
HAPPEE 4TH UV JULY BRUDDERZ AN SISTAHZ!
don't let da fireworkz scare u!
*mi brudder iz in da howse an i am askin him to lemme in. izzen't dat intrestin?

Friday, July 03, 2009

1st day widowt mi mom

wate ... i fergot to tell mi mom sumthin ...
mom ...

pleez take me wid ...


Wednesday, July 01, 2009

wut da?

hey mom ... ware ar u goin?

can i go wid?

pleez?

i gess i will jus play wid mi bee.